Of course, we can’t ever be anyone but ourselves, even if we are good at pretending. We are unique – no one can be us and we can’t be anyone else either. But we try, don’t we? We try to be like other people to prove ourselves as acceptable. To be liked. To belong or fit in. Or because we had the misguided idea that if we admired someone else it meant that they were doing it “right” and we were doing it “wrong.”
Yesterday I was talking with a stylish, sophisticated, wise-beyond-her-years 17 year old. She was telling us how she handles it when one of her peers criticizes the way she does things. She said, “I tell them, ‘Look – You do you, and I’ll do me.'” I got to tell you that when I was 17 I didn’t possess that kind of insight or confidence. I love that she speaks up and supports herself in being exactly who she is. And what’s more – she is showing basic respect for the differences between people, and respect for the right for each person to do it his or her own way.
Belief in the right to be who we are, and the essential goodness of who we are is a fundamental place to start. I not only think that we have the right to be who we are, I truly believe it’s our job. Our whole life purpose is to be ourselves. Not to be as close a proximity to someone else as we can fake. I really feel that each of us, in our uniqueness, is an answer to evolution – an answer to the expansion of both the material world and of consciousness itself. I don’t think I – or you – would be here unless I was called forth and wanted by expansion itself. Clearly, the Universe felt it was lacking the specifics of me! I think the Universe/Consciousness/Evolution wants to look at Existence through my unique eyes – and through your own unique perspective too.
I think the best way for us to be ourselves is to follow our bliss, as Joseph Campbell so amazingly said. And I think the best way to follow our bliss is from the inside out. To check in with ourselves first. To follow what we want to do in the moment rather than what we think we should be doing. Which brings me to a major help in allowing and embracing who we are – letting the “shoulds” go. If we let go of what we “should” be doing, then we can honestly listen to what feels right for us right now. We can learn to feel our way forward from the inside out. Every moment, every step that is guided in that way directs us down our true path. Or, better said, it helps us step in a way that is true for us. Besides, my sense is that life isn’t really about getting anywhere, just about stepping in a way that feels authentic to us. In a way that feels good. Which often leads us to dance our own little jigs of happiness, in my experience. 😉
What do you say? Care to dance? Existence is pretty big, and there’s plenty of room for all of us to dance together with our magnificent, quirky, improvised-by-heart waltzes through life.