What Feels Natural vs. What Feels Normal

The question of natural vs. normal came up recently in The Little School of Big Change community.  The idea here is that “normal” is what is commonly done, the usual, the conventional or even conditioned habits.  The generally accepted attitudes we adopt without thinking.  What is natural to us might be entirely different.  As in, it might be normally expected that a person would feel upset if they lost a job.  “Well, of course I’m sad – anyone would be.”  Yet if the person felt into it before the usual orientation kicked in, they might realize they are feeling a profound sense of freedom to move on to something else, excitement, gladness to be letting go of something that wasn’t feeling good anyway, and any number of other possible responses that could be someone’s natural response to that circumstance.

When we move this into the personal, it gets even juicier for me.  For example, what has been “normal” for me in many areas of my life is clearly not what is actually natural.  I’ve had periods in my life where it was my usual to get upset and feel insecure if someone didn’t like me.  That was my “norm.”  And it was normal for me to not sleep well. But that isn’t natural. And I’ve had a “normal” way of eating that I learned that is absolutely not natural.  

There are a lot of things that have been normal for me that I have learned and have become habitual behaviors that I do without thinking.  Really, I’ve never really thought to ask, what is natural for me? What are my natural rhythms, preferences, ways of being?  How does my unique body, personality, being respond in this situation, in that moment?  What arises naturally out of the “creature of me” as it responds to a new moment?  

What is normal for you? And is that the same as what is natural for you? If you’re like me, you might not have been given a chance as a kid to follow your natural impulses. But we can certainly be curious about that now.  That curiosity can open the door to living our lives in a way that is much more authentic, present and in alignment with natural, life-affirming ways of being! It’s really been eye-opening and freeing to ask myself if something feels normal or if it feels natural.  Maybe it has some juice for your naturally wonderful self too?!